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No Really, I'm Not Mad

Title: No Really, I’m Not Mad
Pairing: KyuWook
Rating: M-rated or NC-17
Warnings: BoyxBoy. Sex. Need I say more?
Disclaimer: I really don’t own them… They own their damnselves. I don’t work for SMent. I’m not even a janitor there.
Author’s Crap: I’m back with another KyuWook! Hope ya’ll enjoy this one! I got the idea for this while I was reading “70 Facts about Kim Ryeowook” on a friend of mine’s tumblr (I’m minwookevilvalenstrife if you care). One of them said that when he gets pissed about something, he cooks a lot.


Kim Ryeowook was voluntarily the housekeeper for the SuJu dorm and does it quite well if you ask the other members of Super Junior. They rarely have to go out to eat because he takes care of their hunger needs. They all love this trait about their eternal maknae and frequently praise him for it. So, why is it that he was in the kitchen furiously making their dinner?

No, seriously… He was moving pots and pans all around the kitchen at an alarming speed. He was even washing some of the dishes that were accumulating in the sink while cooking this meal.

Sungmin blanched when he saw the massive amount of rice that Ryeowook had prepared and set off to the side. Sure there were a lot of them in the dorm but, not that many people to require the mountain of rice that sat off on the counter. That and Eunhyuk, Donghae, Zhou Mi, Siwon, and Henry had all gone out that night.

Yesung walked in the living room to see what was being cooked. He’d smelled while coming down the hall. He shared the same facial expression as Sungmin when he saw the massive amount of food that was being prepared.

“Wookie-ah,” he called from his position in the doorway. “Who are you cooking for? All of Korea?”

Ryeowook turned around and smiled the biggest smile before going back to his business and stirring ferociously at a pot of what appeared to be boiling vegetables.

Yesung raised an eyebrow before turning to Sungmin who just watched the eternal maknae extremely hard at work.

“What’s wrong with him?” Yesung whispered. “He’s cooking like crazy.”

“I don’t know… Who’s gonna eat that mountain of food?” Sungmin whispered back.

They continued to watch as Ryeowook began starting what looked like yet another dish. At that moment, Shindong, Heechul, and Leeteuk came downstairs.

“Something smells good!” Shindong commented. “Actually, a lot of things are smelling good in there…”

Their eyes immediately stopped on the mountains and mountains of food that sat in the kitchen. Ryeowook still was facing the stove and apparently hadn’t noticed his audience. Leeteuk was the first to question.

“What’s going on here? Why is there so much food?” Leeteuk asked Yesung and Sungmin who were still watching Ryeowook.

“I don’t know….” Sungmin said shaking his head. “The piles of food… They just keep growing…”

“You could feed an entire country with all that food…” Heechul remarked.

“Is he expecting people over or something?” Yesung asked still watching Ryeowook.

“I doubt it. He didn’t mention anything about having guests…” Leeteuk said.

“Even if he were, he wouldn’t make that much food…” Shindong added.

They all watched in horror as Ryeowook began plating the food in various heaps. They gulped as he glanced in their direction and gave a big smile.

“Hmmm… He hasn’t made this much food in a while…” Heechul noted. “I’ve got it! The last time he made this much food was that time Kyuhyun locked himself in his room to play Starcraft on Valentine’s Day!”

“But it’s nowhere near Valentine’s Day, hyung…” Yesung pointed out.

“Not that, but, maybe he’s pissed about something…” Sungmin explained. “That would explain why there’s so much food…”

“But, there’s two mysteries remaining: Why is he pissed off and who is he pissed at?” Leeteuk said.

At that moment, Cho Kyuhyun came down the stairs yawning having just woken up from his nap. He stretched his arms above his head and came face to face with a crowd.

“Um… Hi hyungs…?” He offered when they all stared at him. “Do I have something on my face or something?”

“What did you do to Wookie, Kyuhyun-ah?!” Sungmin asked pushing Kyuhyun back into the hallway.

“Yeah! He’s cooking again!” Shindong said.

“He always cooks?” Kyuhyun said confusedly.

“No, he’s “cooking”! A lot of food!!!” Heechul said glaring at the maknae. “You must’ve done something to make him mad…”

“I don’t know! And how can you be so sure it’s me that he’s mad at?!” Kyuhyun asked.

“The only other time he’s been this pissed is when you ignored him on Valentine’s Day so we assumed it was you he was mad at.” Leeteuk spoke.

“You are his boyfriend, after all…” Yesung shrugged his shoulders. “Why would he be mad at us?”

“I don’t know but, I didn’t do anything that would make him mad.” Kyuhyun said.

“Make who mad?” A voice from behind them startled them all.

It was Ryeowook. He still had the same smile that he’d greeted them with. Only now, did they see the evil in that smile. They visibly gulped.

“…You…” Shindong offered.

“Me? I’m not mad at all!” His cheery voice answered. “Dinner’s ready! Come and eat!”

He walked away whistling some tune as the other members exhaled the breaths that they’d been holding.

“See? He wasn’t mad at all!” Kyuhyun said.

“He’s definitely pissed…” Sungmin countered.

“Let’s go before he gets angrier…” Leeteuk urged.

They walked in what was a single-file line to the dinner table. Ryeowook was already seated in front of his plate. They took their seats and eyed the mountains of food on their plates. Kyuhyun nervously took a seat next to Ryeowook and gulped when the eternal maknae gave him a very large smile.

“Well, eat!” Ryeowook ordered.

The members were quick to comply and ate in an awkward silence. The only thing that could be heard was chopsticks clinking against the dishes and the sound of chewing. The food was delicious and ordinarily they would’ve applauded him for his culinary skills. Today was a whole different story.

Shindong finished his food first. He stood up to put his dishes in the sink and Ryeowook stood up to scoop more food onto his band mate’s plate.

“Thanks but, I’m full Ryeowook-ah…” Shindong nervously said.

“Hm?” Ryeowook gave the biggest smile ever as he piled more food onto his

The smile clearly meant “Sit down and eat. If you object, you’ll regret it.” Shindong eagerly took his plate and sat back down with a nervous smile on his face. He’d never been so terrified of the eternal maknae in his life. The rest of the members quickly focused their eyes back on their own plates. Ryeowook sat down and put more food on his own plate.

“How does it taste?” He asked out of the blue.

“Huh?” Kyuhyun said pausing on putting another bite in his mouth.

“How does it taste, Kyuhyun-ah?” He spoke the maknae’s name with a slight venom to it.

“I-It tastes g-good, hyung…” Kyuhyun stammered out.

“Really? I was worried because your face looks like you’re not telling the truth.” He smiled the most evil smile.

“W-why would I l-lie t-to you, hyung?” Kyuhyun’s voice cracked as Ryeowook leaned closer with his smile. “It’s d-delicious…”

“I’m glad to hear that.” Ryeowook kept smiling before taking another bite of his food.

The rest of the dinner was spent in silence while everyone struggled to finish the massive amounts of food on their plates. Sungmin lifted his chopsticks to his lips and just couldn’t find it in him to finish another bite. After three bowls of rice, two bowls of soup, and four plates of vegetable and beef stir-fry, who could?

“Ryeowook-ah…” Sungmin’s voice pained. “I can’t eat another bite… I’m stuffed…”

“Me too…” Yesung said rubbing his sore stomach.

Ryeowook just smiled and stood up. Their eyes widened when they saw his hand reaching near the food but relaxed when he began to clear their plates from the table. He walked over to the sink and began to push the bits of food into the garbage disposal. The rest of the people at the table all glared at Kyuhyun. He raised his hands in mock defense.

“You did this and you’d damn well better fix it Kyuhyun-ah!” Sungmin whispered.

“I don’t even know what I did!” Kyuhyun exclaimed as quietly as he could.

“Go find out! If I have to put one more piece of food in my mouth, I’ll explode!” Shindong glared at him.

“Seriously Kyuhyun-ah…” Leeteuk pressed a hand to his forehead. “Just talk to him, okay?”

“If you don’t talk to him, I’ll erase your game on Starcraft and you’ll have to start all over again, got that?!” Heechul threatened.

“Okay! I’ll talk to him!” Kyuhyun exclaimed loud enough to get Ryeowook’s attention.

When he turned around, the rest of the group glared at Kyuhyun before smiling at Ryeowook nervously. Ryeowook smiled back and resumed washing dishes. They all gave a sigh of relief and stared at Kyuhyun expectantly. Kyuhyun nervously rose from his seat and walked over beside his lover.

“I’ll help you with the dishes, hyung.” He said as calmly as he could.

“I can do it. You go have fun with everyone else.” Ryeowook smiled while drying a plate.

Kyuhyun looked back at the group at the table for advice. They all simultaneously shook their heads no and glared at him. He sighed softly and proceeded to take the drying towel from Ryeowook’s hands. Ryeowook gave what looked like a glare for a split-second before smiling and continuing to wash the dishes. Ryeowook was washing the dishes so fast that Kyuhyun had to work twice as fast at drying the dishes and putting them away to keep up with him. Soon, they were done and the awkward tension remained in the air.

The rest of the present Super Junior members flashed Kyuhyun “hwaiting” and proceeded to leave the room. They all thanked Ryeowook for the meal and went their separate ways.

Kyuhyun stayed behind with Ryeowook. Ryeowook’s smile disappeared when everyone left.

“Why aren’t you going, Kyuhyun-ah?” Ryeowook asked none too kindly.

“I’m not going anywhere… I want to talk…” Kyuhyun spoke gesturing for Ryeowook to have a seat on the couch.

“Oh, so now you wanna talk?” Ryeowook’s tone was clearly pissed off and Kyuhyun realized why he was so angry at his next words. “Well, I’m not in the mood to listen.”

Kyuhyun winced and thought about this past week. He had been so deeply involved with Starcraft that he’d neglected Ryeowook. He’d only played with and given him attention during the concert. Even then, that attention was fan service. So maybe he did kinda deserve Ryeowook’s wrath at the moment.

“Look, I’m sorry I ignored you all this time Wookie hyung…” Kyuhyun took Ryeowook’s hand into his own.

“If you don’t want to spend time with me, just say it. At least I know instead of wasting my time trying to make you want to.” Ryeowook said a little bitterly. “I know that we both have busy schedules, but you could at least spend some free time with me instead of that damn video game…”

“I do want to spend time with you. I want to spend time with you right now.” Kyuhyun spoke.

“I don’t mean sex, Kyuhyun-ah…” Ryeowook snatched his hand away and prepared to leave.

“I’m not talking about just sex, as good as it is.” He grasped the hand again and pulled him back to the couch. “I want to spend time hearing about your day, how you feel. I want to spend time with you in silence if you want. I want to spend time with you however you want to.”

“You’re just saying that to get on my good side.” Ryeowook said blushing slightly before willing it away.

“Is it working?” Kyuhyun asked smirking slightly.

“… Yes…” Ryeowook admitted.

“Good. I love you Kim Ryeowook. I’m sorry I ignored you…” Kyuhyun kissed Ryeowook lightly on his lips.

“I love you too Kyuhyun-ah…” Ryeowook said against his boyfriend’s lips.

“I take that to mean that I’m forgiven?” Kyuhyun asked pressing light kisses on his face.

“Hmm…” Ryeowook pulled away to ponder for a minute. “Not quite… There’s still something more you need to do.”

“What “more” do you have in mind?” Kyuhyun let his fingers wander up Ryeowook’s wrist. “I’ll stop playing Starcraft for a month if I have to.”

“You don’t have to do that…” Ryeowook chuckled bringing a hand up to Kyuhyun’s neck and stroking gently. “I’m sure I’ll think of something…”

Kyuhyun sighed softly and allowed his head to fall limply into Ryeowook’s touch. His piano calloused hands were rough yet, gentle and Kyuhyun loved the touch so much. Ryeowook inched his face closer to Kyuhyun’s face and kissed him hard. Kyuhyun moaned pulling Ryeowook closer to his body and settling his hands around the smaller male’s waist.

“Kyuhyun…” Ryeowook breathed against Kyuhyun’s lips before kissing him again.

The smaller male pushed his tongue in between the slightly parted lips working his way into the other’s mouth. Kyuhyun sighed into the kiss and let his own tongue meet Ryeowook’s in a battle for dominance. Ryeowook submitted to the feather light feel of Kyuhyun’s tongue against his own. He continued to stroke at Kyuhyun’s neck lovingly as his free hand slid down to his waist. Kyuhyun broke free from the soft lips and panted heavily.

“Are we doing this here?” Kyuhyun asked kissing along his boyfriend’s neck.

“Mmm… Can’t go back to my room… Jongwoonie hyung’s in… ahh… there…” Ryeowook moaned and leaned his head to the side to give Kyuhyun more access.

“Sungminnie hyung’s in ours… I guess we’ll have to be quiet and hope that no one comes in…” He placed a kiss to Ryeowook’s Adam’s apple and watched his boyfriend shudder in pleasure.

Kyuhyun’s lips lingered over the pulsating skin of Ryeowook’s neck and bit down lightly smirking as he received a gasp from the pianist. Ryeowook’s hands traveled down to the hem of Kyuhyun’s shirt and slid under it caressing at the skin they found. Kyuhyun groaned moving his own hands under Ryeowook’s shirt in an attempt to remove it. He broke from Ryeowook’s neck and pulled the offending material from his skin.

“Beautiful…” Kyuhyun remarked before attacking Ryeowook’s exposed collarbone.

He began to suck hard at the skin in an attempt to mark the eternal maknae. His efforts paid off when he pulled back and saw a purplish red mark forming in his wake. He smirked before shedding his own shirt and pressing Ryeowook back against the couch lapping at his lips. Ryeowook moaned pulling Kyuhyun by the back of his jeans into his lap grinding happily against him. Kyuhyun’s mouth fell open against Ryeowook’s in a moan as he pressed his backside against his crotch. He felt a bulge forming in his boyfriend’s jeans and grinded even harder against Ryeowook.

“Ryeowook…” Kyuhyun let the name slip from his lips as he captured Ryeowook’s in a rough kiss.

Ryeowook was quick to respond by kissing back and kneading the firm flesh of Kyuhyun’s ass through his jeans. Every once in a while during their heated sessions, Ryeowook would show Kyuhyun how much he admired Kyuhyun’s ass by smacking it and enjoying the reaction that his boyfriend gave him, now was no exception. Kyuhyun grinded down harder against his lower half to get some relief for his own throbbing erection.

“You like that, Kyuhyun-ah?” Ryeowook asked giving another playful slap to his boyfriend’s backside.

“You already know…” Kyuhyun said grinding and making his lover moan.

“Do I?” Ryeowook playfully asked.

“Uh-huh…. Let me up.” Kyuhyun gave one last swivel of his hips against Ryeowook’s watching in satisfaction as the pianist moaned.

Kyuhyun pushed Ryeowook down lengthwise on the loveseat in the living room so that he was on his back. He crawled until he was between Ryeowook’s legs with both hands on his knees. He reached a hand down to cup Ryeowook’s hard-on through his jeans. Ryeowook gave a surprised moan and thrust his hips up to create friction. Kyuhyun smiled and pushed the hips back down instead leaning forward to kiss at Ryeowook’s chest playfully lap at his nipples.

“Kyuhyun-ah… Stop teasing me…” Ryeowook panted as Kyuhyun continued to palm his erection through his pants.

“What if I like teasing you?” He said latching onto one nipple and pulling it upward lightly extricating a loud moan from the eternal maknae. “You have to lower your voice, Wookie… Don’t want anyone coming in and ruining our fun do you?”

Ryeowook nodded as Kyuhyun’s tongue slid down his body making a trail of saliva from his chest to his belly button. He played at the crevice for a minute before kissing the area below where his happy trail started. Kyuhyun’s finger circled around the button of Ryeowook’s jeans as the man below him squirmed urging him to speed up the process.

“So eager…” Kyuhyun snickered undoing the button and sliding the zipper down revealing the white fabric of Ryeowook’s boxer shorts.

He slid them down along with Ryeowook’s denim jeans and pressed a kiss to the start of the little hairs below his belly button.

“Have I ever told you how much I love your happy trail?” Kyuhyun whispered against his lower abdomen. “It’s sexy…”

Ryeowook gasped as Kyuhyun suddenly took his hard exposed member in his hands suddenly and stroked it rapidly. Kyuhyun brought his mouth over the tip of Ryeowook’s cock and licked teasingly at the head.

“Ah! Kyuhyun…” Ryeowook gave a frustrated whine. “Are you trying to make me mad again?”

“Not at all…” Kyuhyun smirked before engulfing the whole thing in an instant.

Ryeowook threw his head back against the couch, hands coming up to tangle themselves in Kyuhyun’s hair. Kyuhyun pulled off suddenly and lapped at the tip watching as Ryeowook’s breathing was becoming heavier. He sucked in the head lightly scraping the sides with his teeth causing Ryeowook’s hands to grip at his hair harder and moan.

“Stop playing around and suck me…” He ordered with as much of a threat as one could make while getting his cock sucked.

Without warning, he again took the whole member in his mouth and bobbed up and down quickly on it. Ryeowook began to buck his hips up into the movement but, Kyuhyun’s hands quickly went to his hips to suppress the movements.

The wet heat around Ryeowook’s aching member was quickly taking its toll on the older male and Kyuhyun knew it. He continued his sucking for a little longer before pulling off to see what he’d accomplished. Ryeowook lay on the couch with one hand pressed against his forehead and one clenched in his hair.

“Wookie…” Kyuhyun whispered in a whine as he pulled his own pants free from his body and pressed his now naked lower half against Ryeowook’s in a slow grind.

He moaned as Ryeowook’s hands slid around to his backside encouraging the grinding motion. Kyuhyun rolled his hips back down to the eternal maknae’s hard member relishing in the moan he was rewarded. Ryeowook’s hands began to knead the flesh of his ass and surprised him when his fingers neared Kyuhyun’s entrance.

“Wookie?” Kyuhyun asked confusedly.

“I wanna fuck you, Kyuhyun-ah…” He spoke pressing a kiss up to his neck. “It’s always the other way around.”

Kyuhyun had to admit that Ryeowook had a point. He’d always taken the other up until now and he was pretty open-minded to anything when it came to sex.

“Okay.” He nodded kissing Ryeowook passionately.

“Where’s the lube?” Ryeowook asked.

Kyuhyun reached under the cushion that Ryeowook’s head was on top of and produced a small tube. Ryeowook grinned before taking the tube from the younger and uncapping it. He spread the clear substance onto his fingers and pressed one to Kyuhyun’s entrance. Kyuhyun sighed and relaxed himself as best he could. Ryeowook’s slim finger made its way about halfway in before Kyuhyun squirmed a little uncomfortably.

“It feels kinda weird…” Kyuhyun said running his hands along Ryeowook’s chest playing with his nipples. “Not gonna lie…”

“It’ll get better. Do you trust me?” Ryeowook asked humming in content with Kyuhyun’s touches.

“That’s a stupid question. If I didn’t-“

“Do you trust me, Kyuhyun-ah?” Ryeowook breathed out his name huskily.

“I do…” He moaned out as Ryeowook wrapped a hand around his cock.

With that, Ryeowook thrust the finger completely in causing Kyuhyun to groan. He waited a little before so Kyuhyun could get used to the feel. It wasn’t like it felt wrong or gross… It just felt weird to Kyuhyun. He’d never done this before and now he knew how Ryeowook felt during their first time together. After a minute, the feeling started to sink into a more pleasurable one as Ryeowook slipped in a second finger scissoring him and stretching him.

He pushed his hips down onto the fingers as the sensation grew more pleasurable. Ryeowook began thrusting his fingers into Kyuhyun’s ass smirking as the younger’s breathing became more ragged. Suddenly, Kyuhyun’s body jolted and he gave a loud cry to which he had to press a hand to his mouth to muffle the noise. Ryeowook smirked because he knew he’d finally found Kyuhyun’s prostate and thrust his fingers into again.

“Ryeowook! Please!” Kyuhyun was seeing stars and wanted nothing more than for Ryeowook to fuck him.

“”Please” what?” Ryeowook teased rubbing slightly against the spot.

“You know damn well what!” Kyuhyun growled.

“I’m afraid I don’t…” Ryeowook grinned that evil grin.

“Kim Ryeowook… Fuck me. Fuck me right now.” Kyuhyun ground out as his boyfriend rubbed that spot teasingly.

“As you wish.” He lifted Kyuhyun’s hips up and slicked himself up nicely.

Ryeowook positioned himself under Kyuhyun and guided his hips to his member. Kyuhyun tensed a little as he felt the tip at his entrance. Ryeowook stroked him soothingly to help him relax, and it worked. Kyuhyun worked the tip inside of him before allowing Ryeowook to pull his hips completely down around his cock. He cried out as Ryeowook’s fullness penetrated his body. It stung but, it wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be.

“Kyuhyun-ah…” Ryeowook spoke through gritted teeth. “Are you okay?”

“I’ll manage…” Kyuhyun took deep breaths with his palms resting on
Ryeowook’s chest.

He relaxed and allowed himself to lift his hips and thrust back down onto Ryeowook’s member. It was hard, hot, and pulsating inside him and Kyuhyun could feel it. Ryeowook moaned grabbing the hips and guiding their thrusts at a slow pace.

Kyuhyun’s breath began to become more drawn out as Ryeowook thrust his hips upward to meet Kyuhyun’s own. His head fell forward as he looked down into Ryeowook’s lust glazed eyes and couldn’t resist the urge to moan. The air around them was hot and the living room was starting to get a bit stuffy but, Kyuhyun would be damned if he wanted it to stop.

The strange sensation once again became a pleasurable one and Ryeowook groaned throwing his head back against the couch thrust upward into Kyuhyun’s body.

“You’re so… tight…” Ryeowook spoke raggedly.

“Faster…” Kyuhyun pleaded running his hands over the expanse of Ryeowook’s body.

Ryeowook was quick to oblige speeding up his thrusting to the point where Kyuhyun was bouncing on top of him. Kyuhyun’s head fell back as he let out a long moan bouncing in time with his lover’s thrusts.

Ryeowook suddenly sat up and pushed him back against the arm rest of the couch and began pounding into him with even more speed and force. Kyuhyun let out a very un-Kyuhyun like squeak and gripped the cushions below him. Ryeowook brought Kyuhyun’s legs over his shoulders and pressed in deeper. Kyuhyun couldn’t contain the loud moan that had broken free when Ryeowook had thrust directly into his prostate.

“Again!” Kyuhyun’s strangled moan broke through the room.

Ryeowook thrust harder in and Kyuhyun pressed his hand to his mouth in an attempt to muffle the would-be-loud scream that escaped from his mouth. He was going to be so hoarse tomorrow but, that didn’t matter. All that mattered at that moment was Ryeowook’s constant pounding and how ridiculously close to orgasm he was.

“I’m so close Wookie…” He panted out fingers clenching and unclenching the fabric of the couch. “Touch me… Please…”

“Down here?” Ryeowook pressed the flat of his palm against Kyuhyun’s member smirking.

“Yes!” Kyuhyun arched upward into Ryeowook’s hand.

Ryeowook chuckled and began to pump at the hard cock in his hand. Pre-cum dripped from the tip and leaked onto his stroking hand. Ryeowook knew Kyuhyun wasn’t going to last much longer and he wasn’t either. He took his free hand and smacked hard at Kyuhyun’s ass watching as the singer below him groaned in pleasure.

Kyuhyun felt himself slipping closer and closer to the edge as Ryeowook stroked him rapidly. One particularly well-aimed thrust hit his prostate one good time and sent him spiraling over.

“Ryeowook!” A strangled cry of the eternal maknae’s name and Kyuhyun came hard over Ryeowook’s hand and onto his own stomach.

Kyuhyun’s muscles tightened and Ryeowook gave a few more thrusts before he tipped over the edge too. His body shook as he came hard into Kyuhyun’s ass. He groaned Kyuhyun’s name loudly and slumped forward over his dazed lover.

The two sat in silence except for their ragged and rushed breathing. Kyuhyun was the first to awaken from his orgasmic bliss and ran a hand up and down Ryeowook’s spine. Ryeowook hummed happily enjoying the contact resisting the urge to fall asleep on top of the maknae.

“Teukie hyung is going to kill us for having sex on the couch again…” Kyuhyun said hoarsely.

“I’m not complaining.” Ryeowook murmured against the skin of Kyuhyun’s neck.

“I don’t want to move for another three days…”

“It hurts for a while afterward… Luckily you’ve got tomorrow off.” Ryeowook reminded him and began pulling himself from his lover’s ass.

Kyuhyun winced at the sore feeling of the exiting member exiting him. Yup, this was definitely going to sting for a couple days.

“You’ll get used to it after a while.” Ryeowook said smirking.

“What if I just fuck you instead?” Kyuhyun teased running a hand up Ryeowook’s arm.

“Just as long as you’re spending time with me.” Ryeowook pressed a kiss to Kyuhyun’s lips.

As Kyuhyun allowed himself to relax into the kiss, an uninvited shriek made its way to the living room. Zhou Mi who had come to visit, stumbled in on the sight of the two quite naked men covered in bodily fluids on the couch. Ryeowook blushed and lowered his gaze and Kyuhyun just laughed.

“Just doin’ a bit of disaster proofing.”


Author’s Crap: Whew, it’s finally done! I hope you guys enjoyed it! It’s as good as I can do at 2:00AM….

April Fools Shenanigans

Title: April Fools Shenanigans
Pairing: SiChul and QMiMin (All pairings very slight)
Rating: T-rated for some swearing and reference to sex
Warning: I think it could be considered crack… My fail humor is fail… MalexMale relationships!
Disclaimer: I really don't own Super Junior... They own their damnselves...
Author’s Crap: Oh the shenanigans that could occur in the SuJu dorm on April Fools Day thanks to Heenim and Kyuhyun…


Leeteuk hated this day. He absolutely hated it. Know what today was? It’s April Fools Day AKA Heechul and Kyuhyun’s favorite holiday. It was an absolute nightmare every April Fools Day. He hated that he knew what would happen and even with his power as leader, he could do nothing to stop the pranks.

Last year, Heechul glued Donghae’s headphones to his desk and poor Shindong’s phone to his cheek. Kyuhyun had thrown a red sock into Leeteuk’s all-white laundry, poured hot sauce into Ryeowook’s milk shake, and went old school by putting a whoopee cushion under Zhou Mi’s seat. Together, they were unstoppable.

Leeteuk shook his head and wondered what horrible pranks awaited them this year. Perhaps they’d surprise them by not doing anything at all? Yeah, no… That’d be too good to be true… However, as much as he disliked the havoc that broke out in the dorm during this day, he had to admit, the pranks that were pulled were pretty damn funny.

“Hyung!!!” A loud voice rang through the 12th floor.

Leeteuk sighed. Let the torture commence. He ran to Heechul’s room where Siwon stood holding a picture of what appeared to be Jesus with a picture of Heechul‘s face glued over Jesus’ head. That was actually pretty good. He had to control his urge to laugh when he saw Siwon’s disappointed face.

“Which way did they go?” He asked.

“They went to Yesung and Wookie’s room. What am I going to do? I have to return this picture to my parents tomorrow…” Siwon sighed putting it back on the bed.

“I’ll find them.” Leeteuk promised before leaving the room.

He hadn’t even made it halfway down the hall before he heard Ryeowook’s loud shriek.

He ran full speed to Yesung and Ryeowook’s shared room and took in the sight before him. Ryeowook was running around the room looking a towel of some sort to wipe up the ice cream spill on his new keyboard; his really expensive new keyboard at that. Upon closer inspection, the spill was actually fake however, so no damage was done. Yesung was trying to shave the beard of Heebum’s fur off of all three of his turtles. The lengths of the beards varied too from biggest turtle to smallest.

“Dammit! I just bought that keyboard!” Ryeowook shrieked absolutely livid as he angrily searched for something to wipe up the “mess”. “They’re going to pay!”

Leeteuk had to bite his tongue to keep from laughing as bits of Heebum’s fur kept getting stuck in Yesung’s nose making him sneeze.

“No kidding… They glued Heebum’s fur to all of my turtles! Even Ddangkoma! He didn’t want a beard and moustache!” Yesung exclaimed.

“Where did they go?” Leeteuk asked once he calmed down.

“They went to Eunhyuk’s room.” Ryeowook went stomping over to his beloved keyboard.

“I’ll go get them.” He promised before exiting the room. “Ryeowook-ah, that spill is fake…”

Ryeowook’s mouth dropped open as he lifted the spill from his keyboard.
Leeteuk snickered slightly before making his way down the stairs to Eunhyuk’s room. He walked inside to find Eunhyuk sitting at his desk and Donghae running over a piece of paper with weird shapes and letters written on it.

“What’s going on hyung?” Eunhyuk asked.

“I’m looking for Kyuhyun and Heechul.” Leeteuk explained. “You know, it’s April Fools Day… They’re bound to be together stirring up all sorts of trouble…”

“They looked like they were headed to Sungminnie hyung’s room.” Donghae said. “I got a letter from aliens! Look!”

He thrust the piece of paper into Leeteuk’s hands. Leeteuk looked at the paper and concluded that it was part of KyuChul’s prank fest. No matter how he looked at it, it was gibberish, in any language.

“Did they do anything to you Hyukkie? You seem rather calm.” Leeteuk asked.

“They took my "stuff" and made it memorable collage. I’m not complaining...” He smirked. "They even laminated it."

“Right… Er, I’m going to go find them….” Leeteuk said leaving the room.

He ran down the hall to Sungmin and Kyuhyun’s room when he saw Zhou Mi and Sungmin seething with rage.

“Teukie hyung, look what they did to all my sunglasses!” Zhou Mi wailed holding up a pair of expensive looking shades.

Leeteuk took them and held them up. They looked fine at first glance but, when he put them on, he couldn’t see anything. They had apparently taken black permanent marker and colored in the lenses. It was pretty clever. He felt the urge to laugh rising up again and quickly suppressed it when he saw Sungmin’s face contorted in anger.

“Look what they did to my favorite guitar!” Sungmin held out his pink acoustic guitar.

Leeteuk looked at it and saw “I worship the King and Queen of pranks!” written in black permanent marker written all over the instrument. He found himself pinching himself in an attempt not to laugh.

“Where did they go?” He asked trying to keep calm.

“They went to your room, hyung.” Zhou Mi answered.

“My room?! We’ve got to stop them!” Leeteuk shrieked.

“When I get my hands on them… Kyuhyun’s not getting any for a week!”

“I agree. I’m going to wring that little brat’s neck!” Sungmin had never looked so evil in his life. “Wait, that doesn’t include me does it, Mimi?”

“Of course not!” Zhou Mi smirked at the older singer. “Now what do you say we go help Teukie hyung find those “kids”?”

“Gladly.” Sungmin got up cracking his knuckles.

Leeteuk stepped out into the hallway with Zhou Mi and Sungmin in tow as they headed back to his room at full speed. They ran into Siwon in the hallway and all ran to Leeteuk’s room where Heechul and Kyuhyun sat on his bed waiting for him.

Leeteuk glared and them and took a quick look around the room. He found nothing out of place and gave a sigh of relief. Apparently they’d gotten there before they could do anything.

“Cho Kyuhyun, you are going to die!” Sungmin bellowed as he lunged for the maknae but was held back by Leeteuk and Siwon.

“Don’t kill him. Yet.” Siwon said. “Hyung, you said that you wouldn’t prank me.”

“Have I ever not pranked you?” Heechul said smirking.

“Well, no but, I’m mad at you!” Siwon yelled. “No sex for a month!”

“What?! All I did was assume my rightful place on that picture! Jesus wasn't complaining!” Heechul blanched. “That’s not fair!”

“It’s either that or bible study for a month. Every day.” Siwon glared. “Your choice.”

“*sigh* I’lll take” no sex” for three hundred, Alex…” He pouted.


“Kibum said it was from some American game show…” Heechul explained.


“Cho Kyuhyun, you are going to be sorry when I’m done with you! So sorry!” Sungmin still tried to break free from his human confines.

“It’s tradition hyung… You can’t break tradition.” Kyuhyun smiled.

“Is that so? Well then, no sex for a week. It’s not an April Fools joke either.” Zhou Mi gave him the most smug look.

“You and I both know that you and Minnie can’t last that long…” Kyuhyun rolled his eyes. “You’ll be crawling back to me in a couple of hours…”

“You testing my patience, Kui Xian?” Zhou Mi asked threateningly. “Keep it up and I’ll make you sleep on the couch.”

“Even you Minnie?” He asked.

“You’re walking on thin ice right now, Kyuhyun-ah…” Sungmin’s icy tone made him sound even more serious.

Kyuhyun looked at both his lovers’ faces and saw that they were quite serious and would do it too. He sighed and hung his head before standing up. He and Heechul went with their respective lovers who made them go to every room and undo all pranks and apologize for their behavior.

After everyone left, Leeteuk sighed and laughed loudly. He was glad that was over even if some of the pranks were priceless. He was looking forward to getting some well-deserved rest. He climbed into bed and fell into a deep slumber.

He didn’t get that far into it because of a heavy weight being dropped on his stomach knocking all the wind out of him.

“What the hell?!” He exclaimed groggily.

“Huh? Teukie hyung? You’re not an alien!” Donghae pouted. “The note from the aliens said they'd be here!”

“What note?!” He asked even though he knew he was not going to like the answer.

“When Heechul hyung and Kyuhyun came to apologize, Kyuhyun said that the aliens said that they were in your room!”

Leeteuk paled.

“Come on Donghae.” Leeteuk sat up and rose from his bed.

“Huh? Where are we going?” Donghae asked.

“We’re going “alien” hunting.” Leeteuk said with an evil smile on his face.


Author’s Crap: Excuse my fail… It’s April Fools Day and I had to write it…. What do you expect at 2:25 AM? (At the time I wrote this)

Effective Stress Relief

Title: Effective Stress Relief
Pairing: KyuWook
Warning: BoyxBoy… Don’t like, don’t read… It’s also M-rated…
Rating: M-Rated
Disclaimer: I really don’t own Super Junior… I’m not even part of SMent… I don’t even work as the custodian there…
Author’s Note: I got this idea after watching someone be pissed off. I’ve heard that this is a good way to calm them down.

Kyuhyun sighed as he stepped into the unusually quiet Super Junior dorm. He glanced around for any sign of the other members and found none.

“Where is everyone?” He asked to no one in particular and received no response.

He dragged himself into the kitchen, bags from earlier activities still in hand as he grabbed a piece of fruit from the counter. He found a banana that was starting to take the brownish bruises. After giving it a once-over he decided that it was still pretty good and proceeded to go to his and Sungmin’s shared room.

He stopped in front of his door and noted that his roommate was absent due to the lack of noise. He balanced the banana between his teeth as he fished for his keys in his pockets. He finally found it and proceeded to open the door and drop his bags in the corner of the room. He sighed and quickly ate his banana before flopping onto his bed tiredly.

His schedule had been becoming increasingly hectic. With upcoming concerts, promotions, radio, and anything else that he could think of, Kyuhyun was effectively tired… He’d been getting less and less sleep lately and it was beginning to take its toll on him. He was a lot crankier to the other members and other people. Whenever someone would ask what was wrong with him, he’d snap and vacate the area. It was mainly Leeteuk who was on the receiving end of this. Kyuhyun knew that it was his job as leader and his friend to worry about the health of his bandmates but, the persistent asking was not helping matters.

Kyuhyun sighed remembering that he snapped badly earlier that day at the worried leader. He’d really have to apologize later. But right now, he just wanted to get some sleep in before the others returned.

He yawned and curled up settling underneath his covers with the prospect of sleep on his mind. Just as he slipped his eyes closed, a loud noise sounded through the thin walls of his room. He opened his eyes for a split second before closing them ignoring it. It came again, a little louder this time. He sat up angrily with a groan. He climbed out of his bed and proceeded to walk down the hall to find the source of his annoyance. He stopped in front of Yesung and Ryeowook’s shared room. He didn’t even knock as he entered the unlocked room and entered upon a sight he shouldn’t have.

“Hey! What’s all that noise?!” Kyuhyun asked annoyed.
He looked to Ryeowook’s bed and found the eternal maknae on his bed with his hand wrapped around one very hard erection. There was a large shiny drop of liquid forming at the tip and it began to slide down onto Ryeowook’s hand. He gulped and stood in shock for at least a minute before leaving the room with a muttered apology.

Ryeowook sat on his bed bewildered at what had just happened. He didn’t even hear his dongsaeng come home. He rose covering himself back up to confront the male on what had just happened but, Kyuhyun was nowhere to be seen.

Kyuhyun, who had escaped back to his room rather quickly for someone so exhausted, was pressed up behind his locked door. He panted for air at having run so fast and what he’d just witnessed moments before. He slid down the door and clutched at his wildly beating heart.

“What the hell?” He asked himself in a shaky voice.

He stood up once he was able to breathe normally and walked over to his bed. He was damn tired still but, he wasn’t even sure he’d be able to sleep anymore. He laid himself down and attempted to sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, the image of Ryeowook’s hard and leaking cock came to his mind. He cursed as he felt himself getting hard. He pressed a palm to his jeans and felt the forming hardness there. He quickly pulled his hand back and forced his eyes open. He gave a whine of frustration. He refused to jack himself off when someone else was home and most likely doing the same thing, and he couldn’t sleep without being tormented by the image of his fellow bandmate.

He resigned to pulling out his laptop and taking his anger out Starcraft. He felt sorry for anything that dare attack him.


He sat in front of his computer for about two hours before he heard some of the other members returning to their rooms. He heard his door open and Sungmin stepped in with a pastry of some sort in his hand.

“Hey.” He greeted shrugging off his jacket and hanging it up in his closet.

“Hey.” Kyuhyun said back not once taking his eyes off the screen.

“Still playing Starcraft, huh?” Sungmin asked taking a bite of the pastry.

“What’s it look like, hyung?” Kyuhyun asked rudely still not looking up from from the screen.

“What crawled up your ass and died?” Sungmin glared before angrily leaving the room.

Kyuhyun sighed. He hadn’t meant to snap at Sungmin like that. He was just tired and sick of not being able to sleep properly. He would’ve gotten some sleep earlier if it hadn’t been for a certain someone. Kyuhyun’s anger was slowly building back up and he gave a frustrated growl.

Maybe a drink would help him calm down. He stood and walked to the kitchen. He opened the refrigerator and reached behind the milk for the beer that he’d put in there two days ago. When his fingers didn’t feel the bottle, he moved the milk to his dismay, it was gone. Oh great… Now someone drank HIS beer that HE paid for.
He entered the living room where Shindong, Yesung, Leeteuk, and Donghae were sitting.

“Who drank my beer?” He asked none too politely.

“Oh, sorry Kyuhyun-ah… I drank it.” Shindong admitted. “I had assumed that it was okay.”

Kyuhyun had opened his mouth to say something but left the room briskly. Leeteuk called after him worriedly but Kyuhyun didn’t stop his angry trek back to his room. The anger and lack of sleep combined was coursing through his body.

He returned to his room and fell upon his bed in an angry heap. Why? Why was he so mad? Catching a bandmate during private time was hardly a reason to be upset so, why was he so angry? He was tired. That much he knew but, what was the other reason?

“You’re sexually frustrated…” Sungmin said walking back into their shared room. “He’s right there and you’re too scared to go “get it”…”

Kyuhyun looked up from his pillow; he hadn’t realized that he said that out loud. Sungmin sat down on his own bed and plugged his phone up to the charger.

“Wookie wants you to come to his room. He says it’s important.” Sungmin said yawning.

Kyuhyun snorted and stood to go to the eternal maknae’s room.

“Hopefully, whatever he’s got to tell you will get rid of your bitch mode… Seriously, it’s worse than Heechul-hyung…” Sungmin said kicking off his socks.

Kyuhyun said nothing and left their room locking the door behind him. He stood outside of the door for a couple seconds staring at the floor. No doubt he wants to talk about what happened. Kyuhyun felt his cheeks heat up at the mere thought of his hyung in a compromising situation and shuddered. He quickly regained composure and began walking to Ryeowook and Yesung’s shared room. The walk to the room was too short and Kyuhyun found himself in front of the door.

He swallowed before lifting his hand and knocking on the door quietly. The door opened and Ryeowook greeted him warmly before ushering him inside. He closed the door and locked it before turning his gaze on Kyuhyun. There was something different about the look Ryeowook was giving him. The usually kind almost motherly stare that his hyung gave him was replaced with this gaze that Kyuhyun couldn’t place a name on.

“Hyung? What’s going on?” Kyuhyun asked as calmly as he could without sounding as nervous as he was.

“You’ve been going around all day snapping people’s heads off…” Ryeowook pointed out leaning against his door. “Was what you saw really that frustrating?”

Kyuhyun paled.

“N-no… That was…” Kyuhyun began but was cut off by his smaller hyung grabbing him by his crotch.

“Kyuhyun…” Ryeowook spoke in a voice dripping with lust.

“Y-yes?” Kyuhyun answered in a shaky voice that failed to mask how much the touch was turning him on.

Instead of answering, Ryeowook slid his hand up and down the hardening bulge protruding from Kyuhyun’s lower half. Kyuhyun bit back a moan as he pushed against his hyung with a great deal of force but to no avail. The other singer reversed their positions so that Kyuhyun was the one up against the door. Ryeowook gripped his clothed member a little more tightly forcing a gasp from the maknae. Kyuhyun’s blood was racing rapidly downward as he attempted to figure out what had gotten into Ryeowook.

“Kyuhyun-ah…” He spoke huskily as he stoked the clothed member teasingly.

Kyuhyun pushed his hips forward slightly allowing himself to give into the other singer’s touches. Ryeowook smirked and slid down to his knees to undo Kyuhyun’s jeans. He wasted no time unbuttoning the material that he deemed cumbersome and proceeded to pull them off along with Kyuhyun’s boxers. He grasped the length in his calloused hands and proceeded to stroke it at a quick pace while he lapped at the head.

“Hyung?!” Kyuhyun threw his head back against the door and wove his hands into Ryeowook’s hair.

Ryeowook licked at the tip for a little bit before engulfing it in his mouth. Kyuhyun’s grip on Ryeowook’s hair tightened and moaned loudly. Ryeowook pulled back quickly and clucked his tongue at him.

“Nu-huh. Not so loud, Kyuhyun-ah…” He whispered placing a kiss to the head of Kyuhyun’s member.

Kyuhyun retracted one hand and bit down on the back of it lightly. Ryeowook smirked before going back to his original task of blowing the maknae. He once again engulfed the head and got it about a quarter of the way down before beginning to bob on the length. Kyuhyun bit a little harder to control his moans. Why was this even happening? Why was he enjoying this? Why Ryeowook? As much as he wanted to know the answers, the questions seemed irrelevant and all he knew was that Ryeowook’s mouth was working wonders on his hard cock.

Ryeowook relaxed his throat muscles a little and took the rest into his mouth. Kyuhyun had to fight to resist cumming right then and there. Ryeowook’s tongue caressed the sides of his member as he sucked quickly. The wet heat of the singer’s mouth around his hard member was sensational. He secretly wondered if Ryeowook had done this for anyone else. Ryeowook’s own hands had slipped away from their place on Kyuhyun’s thighs to his own jeans. He was working the button loose and freeing his own hard cock while sucking Kyuhyun off vigorously. Kyuhyun moaned at the sight and completely gave himself to the feeling of the mouth around him.

“Fuck…” Kyuhyun in a muffled voice swore against his hand. “Ryeowook…”

The muffled moan went straight to Ryeowook’s cock and he stroked his member in time with the rate that he was sucking off Kyuhyun. His moans turned into pleasurable vibrations against Kyuhyun’s cock and the maknae moaned again. Ryeowook’s closed eyes opened when he pulled back slightly to lick at Kyuhyun.

“Kyuhyun-ah…” Ryeowook moaned while stroking rapidly at his own cock. “You like this?”

Kyuhyun gave a jerky nod as Ryeowook took him back into his mouth. He had to bite harder on his hand because Ryeowook’s pace combined with his tongue movements were dangerously close to bringing Kyuhyun over the edge any minute now.

“Hyung!” Kyuhyun choked out because just looking at Ryeowook seemed to make his impeding release not that far off. “I’m so close…”

Ryeowook smirked and moaned around his dongsaeng’s member. He was close to losing it too. He pulled away from Kyuhyun’s member and lapped at the tip. Kyuhyun threw his head back and gave a loud moan that was sure to be heard by the rest of the members of the dorm as Ryeowook’s tongue lapped at the slit and came hard. Ryeowook quickly took the head of the member back into his mouth to catch the rest of Kyuhyun’s release in his mouth swallowing it. He pumped himself faster and harder until he released too. He grabbed one of his nearby dirty shirts and shot his release on it.

“Kyuhyun-ah! Kyuhyun-ah!” He moaned loudly as he continued to stroke languidly milking himself completely.

Kyuhyun’s post-orgasmic bliss caused him to sink to the floor in front of Ryeowook who began cleaning at himself with it. He smirked when he saw Kyuhyun’s labored breathing and the quick rising and falling of his chest.

They both sat on the floor in silence for a few seconds before Ryeowook made his way to his feet and extended a hand for Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun grasped it and stood on shaky legs bracing himself on the door as he righted his clothes and watched Ryeowook do the same.

“Hyung,” He began when he felt he’d gained enough strength to speak. “Why?”

Ryeowook put the shirt back in the hamper and smirked.

“You apparently needed it.” Ryeowook said as a matter of factly. “I know I sure as hell did…”

Kyuhyun couldn’t deny that he needed the contact that Ryeowook had provided. He wasn’t angry anymore but, he was damn tired… He needed to make his way to his bed and sleep even though he wasn’t sure how much he’d get with the other’s making their noise and Sungmin was bound to be practicing his guitar. He sighed before turning to face the door.

“Kyuhyun-ah,” Ryeowook spoke. “If you feel like you ever need that again, don’t hesitate to come to my room. I’m sure I could convince Jongwoon-hyung to leave for a bit….”

Kyuhyun nodded and made his way to his room and collapsed on his bed. Not even bothering to change out of his clothes, he quickly crawled under his covers and shut his eyes too tired to form thoughts. The noise of the others excluding Sungmin who was sleeping peacefully with his sleep mask pulled over his eyes couldn’t keep him awake even if they were hooked up to a stereo next to his ears. He smiled slightly and thanked Ryeowook silently for providing him with two services that night: a cure for his anger and his much needed rest.


Yay! It’s finished… I’m sorry if the ending sucks… Or hell, if anything sucks… I’m fail at a lot of things and this is no exception. Thank you for putting up with my crap if you read through to the end. I do apologize if this was confusing as hell, I wrote it at 3:00 AM… I hate how that’s the only time I get inspiration and that it’s the same time I want to do nothing more than sleep… Oh, for those that are reading PokeSuJu, I haven’t abandoned it. I was taking a break. I had originally wrote out the new chapter but, I didn’t like the way it was sounding so I decided to take a break until I could come up with something satisfactory. Well, hope ya’ll enjoyed it!

Shisus... Calm The Hell Down...

I’m just gonna say a few words on the subject of Leeteuk’s comments on the radio and then, ALL, yes, ALL of us are going to drop it like it’s a fuckin’ hot potato!

People, especially idols, say dumb crap in public ALL THE TIME!!!! It’s happened with JYJ; it’s happened with SNSD; it’s happened with SuJu-M; it’s happened with buttloads of people! Stop acting like it’s new.

As long as he apologizes, which he most likely will, it is settled. A heartfelt apology is all people want no matter how much they say they “have lost respect” or “are upset”. It’s a dead horse as soon as he apologizes so, do not beat it please! Hell, even if he doesn’t apologize, what good are you doing by remaining angry for something that is out of your control?

He said that he was joking! If it was a cover-up for the comment, I’ve no clue but, if he said he was joking, then, shit, he was joking! The comment might’ve been really in bad humor but, how many of you joke around with your friends in such a manner? Probably not with the choice of words that Leeteuk chose but similar. All of you. If you say you haven’t you are lying to yourself and you are a hypocrite. Whether it was intentional or not, you have said something to a friend and gone too far.

With all these people calling him an “ass” or a “douchebag” or something else, I’m damn sure that he realized that “Oops, that wasn’t really a smart thing to say. I should choose my words more carefully next time”. Get off your high horse and accept that everyone has a less than glorious moment every once in a while and that your idols are ONLY HUMAN!!!!

Now that I’ve said my piece, we are going to drop it and leave him and other idols who have done similar things the fuck alone. It is over; it’s a two-minute scandal; move the fuck on.

P.S. Sorry about all the swearing. When I am explaining my point of view, I tend to drop words I shouldn’t…. Sorry if that offends you but I’m not changing it either.

This is taken from my post to my Tumblr. I am minwookevilvalenstrife there.


Now, we should all know about Junsu's recent posting about TVXQ!'s comback on Twitter. If you don't, go and google it before reading this post.

For the rest of you, why is it that now people are bashing those who made comments about what was said?
I'm talking about the comments said about Sungmin, Shindong, BoA, and Sim Jaewon.
Why the hell are people bashing them? They spoke their minds! They know Xiah, and as much as we like to think we do, we don't!!!! They responded the way any friend of someone would! If your friend was posting something rude about your other friends, wouldn't you stand up for your friend? How the hell is that any different from what they did?

It's mostly the blind morons who are bashing these artists. While you may have your own feelings on the comeback, bashing someone else will not make a situation any better.

No, Sungmin, Shindong, BoA, and Sim Jaewon did not bash Xiah, they let him know how much the comment hurt them.
They are saying these things because they actually KNOW Xiah and wanted to defend their friends.

TVXQ! already has enough going against them without having your own former members not supporting you. I love JYJ and I love TVXQ! and support both equally but I'm not so blind that I will not notice this.
I have a brain and am able to formulate opinions on things such as this. What was said, should not have been said because it did just serve to aggrivate Cassies and other members of the SM family.

If you are a Cassie and you are bashing these other artists, shut up and sit the hell down. I am also a Cassie and I'm defending those that were targeted because I BELIEVE in them. If you are a Cassie, you will do the same!

People should not bash the artists who were merely sticking up for their friends. It's not right and it makes you look like an asshole. If you are one of the assholes that is bashing these artists, please take a bright red chair and sit your ass down. Shut up and stop smearing these artists names just because you don't like what they have to say. They know him, you don't. Sit the hell down.

PokéSuJu? (3/?)

Title: PokéSuJu? (3/?)
Pairing: KyuMi, EunHae, and whatever else I feel like throwing in there
Rating: T for coarse language and adult-situations
Genre: Crack, romance, and fail!Humor
Summary: Who knew playing Pokémon could turn you into one? Not SuJu.
Author’s Crap: Forgive me for this pile of feces I’ve written… It just gets weirder and weirder… I’m even confused as to how I’m gonna pull this off… So, I’ve included in this chapter a list of what everyone is and what they look like! I was a tard and forgot to do that last chapter! To avoid spoiling some of the surprises of this chapter, I’ve provided links as opposed to actual pics. Don’t wanna spoil the chapter!

The PokéSuJu Cast:

Kyuhyun- http://www.gamingangels.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/Pikachu.gif

Zhou Mi- http://www.dltk-kids.com/pokemon/adoptions/027.gif

Sungmin- http://debonair.tsuidreams.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/cyndaquil.jpg

Shindong- http://studiokitsu.net/gallery/commissions/hoodies/munchlax/munchlaxreference.gif

Ryeowook- http://lostasock.typepad.com/my_weblog/images/jigglypuff_1.jpg

Yesung- http://www.pokemon-pearl-diamond.com/characters/turtwig.jpg

Eunhyuk- http://pbnpokemonbattlenetwork.webs.com/190Aipom.png

Donghae- http://files.sharenator.com/magikarp_Pokemon-s275x300-56464-580.gif

Siwon- http://archives.bulbagarden.net/media/upload/3/3b/077Ponyta.png

Heechul- http://images.wikia.com/pokemon/images/b/b3/Persian.png

Kangin- http://static.pokemoncraft.com/images/pokemons/246Larvitar.png

Leeteuk (Do not look at if you don’t want to be spoiled)- http://thumbs2.modthesims.info/img/1/8/3/6/0/1/MTS2_malfoya_1114899_ash.png

Kibum (Do not look at if you don’t want to be spoiled)- http://images.wikia.com/pokemon/images/f/f6/Abra.png

Hangeng/Hankyung (Do not look at if you don’t want to be spoiled)- http://pokemonelite2000.com/pictures/sugimoris/sugimoris041.png


“Teukie hyung?” The Pikachu on the bed asked as their leader sat up in his bed.

He opened his eyes and looked around the room at all the Pokémon that filled his room.

“There are Pokémon in my room.” He said before doing the only thing he could do at that point; he fainted.

“Teukie hyung!” Kyuhyun ran up to his leader’s face and slapped him lightly to get some kind of response.

It was no use. He was out cold. Kyuhyun frowned before he got an idea.

“Sorry, hyung, this is gonna hurt…” He said before using a powerful Thundershock on his hyung.

“Wait,” Eunhyuk spoke up. “Why is he not a Pokémon too?”

“I… Don’t know…” Kyuhyun said puzzled. “Let’s ask him.”

“Ugh…*cough*” Leeteuk sat up still shaking from the aftershocks of the attack. “What happened?”

He looked around again and saw Pokémon and whispered “oh” to himself.

“Hyung, I know, this looks weird but, please don’t freak out.” Kyuhyun tried to explain. “We’ve been turned into Pokémon for God knows what reason.”

Leeteuk took a deep breath before even thinking about speaking. He took another look at his dongsaengs and sighed.

“Okay, so, let me get this straight,” Leeteuk spoke as calmly as he could. “You, all of you, have been turned into… Oh, God… Pokémon?”

“Yes, hyung.” Kangin the Larvitar said sitting himself on his hyung’s lap and taking his hands. “And you are still human.”

“Oh, Kangin… What happened to you?” Leeteuk spoke taking the Pokémon’s tiny hands in his own. “I don’t know why I’m still human.”

Donghae the Magikarp looked up from his fishbowl and saw something familiar about his leader’s clothing.

“Teukie hyung,” He began. “Why are you dressed like Ash from Pokémon?”

The whole roomed nodded and gasped in agreement. Their leader had a blue and white vest and green gloves to match. The hat lay beside him on the other half of the pillow.

“Uh oh…” Leeteuk began. “I’m a Pokémon trainer!”

Sungmin and Zhou Mi burst into laughter again and Kyuhyun groaned as he turned around and glared at the two.

“Stop laughing!” Leeteuk yelled. “This is serious.”

“I agree…” A voice belonging to a brownish gold Pokémon said.

All eyes suddenly turned to the new Pokémon that had appeared in the room.

“Ki-Kibummie?” Heechul asked.

“Yup.” Kibum the Abra said. “And before you ask, I teleported.”

“Ah, okay.” Heechul said before jumping to their leader’s bed and nuzzling the Abra. “I missed you Bummie!”

“I just saw you two days ago.” Kibum said. “Now, I see that the rest of you are Pokémon too.”

“Yeah, Bummie. I don’t know how, but we’re all Pokémon! I’m a Magikarp!” Donghae cried out leaping out from his fishbowl slightly.

“It’s good to see you too Donghae.” The Abra smiled before turning to their leader. “So, what do you make of this Teukie hyung?”

“Well, from the looks of it, I’m a Pokémon trainer and you guys are all my Pokémon.” He said. “But, how did you know to teleport here?”

“Heechul hyung sent me a picture of you guys.” Kibum answered.

“Did anyone text Hankyung?” Leeteuk asked. “If you guys are all Pokémon, chances are, he is too.”

“I did that a little while ago.” Zhou Mi piped up holding his cell in the air.

“Well, let’s clear out of here and go into the kitchen.” Leeteuk said standing.

Henry the Totodile noticed something roll onto the floor and picked it up.

“Hey hyung, I found a Pokéball!” He said tossing it to the leader.

Leeteuk stared at it for a while and then looked to his side to see 13 of the red and white balls next to him along with a little red device.

“There’s 13 more right here. And there’s also a Pokédex.” He held up the red device in his hand to show everyone else. “Alright, shall we get a move on?”

The leader stepped out the door first and was followed by his dongsaengs. When they reached the kitchen, Kibum was already sitting on the couch with a book.

“What are we going to eat for breakfast? Wookie’s too short to reach the stove.” Heechul the Persian pointed out.

“Hey, I resent that. And I’ll manage. Teukie hyung, can you put a chair and a couple of phone books near the stove?” Ryeowook asked pointing.

Leeteuk nodded before walking over to do what his dongsaeng asked.

“Hey, guys,” Zhou Mi spoke. “I just got a text from HanGeng ge.”

“Oh, what’d he say? Is he a Pokémon too?” Kyu asked from his position in front of the TV.

“I’m not sure, he didn’t say. Said he’s on his way over though.”

“How? He’s in China. That’s gonna take a while.” Kyuhyun asked while flipping through the channels.

“Maybe turned into a flying type…” Heechul offered while poking at Siwon’s hooves.

“That would make sense…” Leeteuk agreed. “Do you need anything else Wookie?”

“Nope. Thanks hyung!” He jumped over to the refrigerator and grabbed everything he needed.

Sungmin, Shindong, and Yesung sat on one end of the couch sleeping. Kangin sat on the floor with Henry who was playing with Leeteuk’s Pokédex.  Kibum was flipping through his book while Donghae and Eunhyuk sat talking about all the different things they could do now that they had Pokémon forms.

“I can actually swim in the bathtub!” Donghae cried happily. “It’ll be so much fun!”

“I know! And I can climb up trees and stuff!” Eunhyuk added. “What should we do first?!”

“No one’s doing anything until we figure out what’s going on.” Leeteuk said pulling up a chair. “We can’t let the public know what’s happened to us! Who knows what could happen?”

“That’s true but, we can’t just sit around and do nothing…” Siwon said flames flaring up when Heechul accidently scraped him with a claw.

“Well, first, we should let our manager hyung know. Even with our current forms, we still have a job to do.” Kyuhyun responded hopping down from the couch and walking over to the kitchen.

“I’ll go call him now. Please behave while I’m doing that and Henry, give me that.” He held out his hand and took the Pokédex from the Totodile.

Henry frowned before squirting up a little fountain of water.

“Hey, watch it!” Siwon complained. “Fire, remember?!”

“Oh, sorry Siwon ge…” Henry said reaching for a magazine instead.

“Hey, watch the TV!” Kangin scolded.

“Oh, hush Kanginnie… You’re so whipped…” Heechul snorted.

“Hyung, I am a Larvitar now, do you really want to start this?” Kangin said standing.

“You’re not scaring me.” Heechul waved him off.

Kangin let out a loud noise that shook the windows and glassware of the dorm. Leeteuk ran back in the room having just gotten off the phone with their manager. The rest of the Pokémon in the room groaned and covered their ears.

“Hyung, what the hell?!!!” Sungmin groaned angry at being woken from his nap.

“Hyung, too loud!!!” Kyuhyun said turning the volume on the TV up.

“Kangin, stop!” Their leader’s voice rang through the room. “What did I just say?!”

Kangin stopped immediately and blushed a deep red. Leeteuk returned to his chair.

“What’d you do that for, hyung?!” Kyuhyun was pissed.

“I agree with PikaKyu, what the hell, hyung?!” Sungmin chimed in angrily.

The silence in the room was deadly as the sparks from Kyuhyun’s cheeks grew.

“I said not to call me that!” Kyuhyun prepared to unleash a large Thunderbolt attack on the fire mouse.

However, before he could, Leeteuk picked up the electric rodent with a pair of rubber gloves nullifying the attack.

“Oh, no you don’t.” He said pulling out two pieces of tape and two circular pieces of rubber. “You have got to learn to control your temper.”

He put the rubber over the Pikachu’s cheeks and taped them in place. The Pikachu tried to unleash a Thundershock but nothing happened.

“Wha-?” He started.

“Now, you can’t shock people when you get angry. You need to control your powers.” Leeteuk scolded.

“That’s not fair, hyung!!!” Kyuhyun whined.

“I don’t know. I kinda like teasing you and you not being able to do anything about it. Then again, you couldn’t do anything anyway Mr. Electric type.” Zhou Mi teased.

“Keep that up and you won’t be able to play in the new sandbox I just ordered.” Leeteuk said.

“What?! Really? You bought a sandbox?” Zhou Mi squealed in delight.

“Tease him again and watch me take it back.” Umma Teukie said firmly.

Zhou Mi quickly silenced himself and went over to look at the magazine with Henry. Leeteuk cleared his throat before beginning to talk again.

“Now, I just got off the phone with our manager, he can’t make it over because he’s out of town on business but, he did say that we were not do any public activity like singing or TV until he gets back in a couple of days.” Leeteuk relayed the info to his dongsaengs. “So, we’ll have to lay low for a while.”

“That sounds boring…” Heechul spoke while texting.

“I know, but if the public finds out that the majority of Super Junior has been turned into Pokémon, it’ll be a huge scandal and there will be camera’s all over us for the next 5 years.” Leeteuk reasoned.

“I actually think the fangirls would like the idea.” Shindong replied. “I mean, we’re adorable. I think we should do a concert like this.”

“Oooh, me too!!!” Donghae was excited.

“It sounds fun!!!” Eunhyuk added equally excited.

“No, and that’s final. We have to first figure out why we’re like this before we go doing any concerts.” Leeteuk said.

“Breakfast is ready!” Ryeowook called from the kitchen.

“We’ll talk over breakfast.” Leeteuk said walking to the table. “Wookie, I’ll put the food on the table.”

They all sat at the table reaching for their bowls. Sungmin tried to pick up his chopsticks and failed miserably while Siwon just didn’t even bother.

“Teukie hyung, I can’t pick up my chopsticks!!!” Sungmin wailed.

“Hyung, how am I supposed to eat?” Siwon asked.

“Hyung, I have paws.” Heechul added.

“Umma, I’m in a bowl…” Donghae pointed out.

“Hyung, Donghae’s in a bowl.” Eunhyuk pointed at his Magikarp.

“Hyung, how are we supposed to eat?” Ryeowook asked.

“Leeteuk ge, my claws are too sharp to pick up the chopsticks…” Zhou Mi complained.

“Hyung-“ The last complaint was cut off.

“SHUT UP!!!!!!” Kangin roared. “Use your mouths!!!”

The whole room “oh”ed at the idea and began to eat food from their bowls.

“What about me?” Donghae the Magikarp asked.

“Oh for the love of—“ Kangin hopped onto the table walked over to the fishbowl and threw a piece of kimchi into the bowl.

Donghae swam up and ate it happily.

“Thank you Kangin…” Leeteuk sighed. “While I was on the phone I was looking at my Pokédex and it said that we had been suggested for entry into the Pokémon League Challenge.”

“Well, who the hell suggested that?!” Kangin asked while munching on his food.

“I don’t know but,” Leeteuk began. “From the looks of it, we have to defeat the 8 gym leaders in each of the towns and then journey to the Elite Four to take on the Pokémon League.”

“Do you think we’ll get our human forms back if we defeat the Pokémon League, hyung?” Kyuhyun asked.

“I think so. It makes the most sense… Now, the only problem is how we’re going to get there without people noticing us…” Leeteuk pondered.

“Hyung, there’s something scratching at the window.” Kibum the Abra pointed to the window.

Leeteuk rose from his chair and went to the window to see what it was. He saw a small green bat outside the dorm. He opened the window and the bat came flying in.

“So… Tired…” The bat fell from the air and collapsed on the floor.

“Guys, I think it’s Hankyung…” Leeteuk said picking up the passed out bat from the floor.


The end of Chapter Three! I hope it was satisfactory!!! And in case anyone’s wondering, Hangeng’s a shiny Zubat. I love shiny Zubat and I really wanted to put it in there. Please let me know what you thought and please kick me if I forget anything!!!

PokéSuJu? (2/?)

Title: PokéSuJu? (2/?)
Pairing: KyuMi, EunHae, and whatever else I feel like throwing in there
Rating: T for coarse language and adult-situations
Genre: Crack, romance, and fail!Humor
Summary: Who knew playing Pokémon could turn you into one? Not SuJu.
Author’s Crap: Forgive me for this pile of feces I’ve written… It just gets weirder and weirder… I’m even confused as to how I’m gonna pull this off…


A figure stirred beside the screaming rodent.

“… Ngh… Kui Xian?” Zhou Mi lifted his head slowly. “…Hmm… Why are you awake?”

“Zhou M—“ The words died on his lips as he looked as his Chinese boyfriend lifted himself from the covers. “Zhou Mi…”

“Yes, Kui Xian?” He wasn’t fully awake yet either.

“Mi, open your eyes…” Kyuhyun tried to say it as calmly as he could.

“Okaay?” He opened his eyes and burst out laughing.

Kyuhyun stood on his bed as a Pikachu. He was yellow with the ears and the tail to boot. Zhou Mi took another look at his boyfriend before cracking up laughing again.

“It’s not funny, Mi!!!” Kyuhyun exclaimed cheeks charging with electricity. “And, look at yourself!!!”

He grabbed his cell phone with his two paws and took a picture of his boyfriend. Zhou Mi wiped a tear from his eye with a goldenrod coloured paw. He sat up fully and took the phone from his boyfriend. He was still chuckling softly when he saw the picture in the phone.

“What the hell?!!!!!” He exclaimed in Chinese. “How--?”

He stood up completely and patted himself down. He had some kind of way turned into a Sandshrew. His body was a greenish hew of goldenrod and his hands had been turned into pads. He had big black eyes and a tail. He jumped up and ran all around the tiny space on the bed.

He continued to freak out as Kyuhyun just sat there and watched him. He knew Zhou Mi’s freak out routines. He’d eventually stop because he was tired. Luckily, it didn’t take long for him to collapse back onto the bed and calm down a little.

“Mi, listen to me. Calmly, please.” Kyuhyun had walked over to his boyfriend, grabbed his face and made him look at him. “I don’t know how we got like this but, we’ve been turned into Pokémon. Gawd, that sounds weird…”

Then suddenly, they heard more screaming down the hall.

“That’s Sungmin!” Kyuhyun noted and pulled his boyfriend to his feet. “Let’s go see what happened!”

They jumped off the bed and ran on all fours to his and Sungmin’s shared room. When they got to the room, they saw a little black mouse with large fiery quills on its back slapping awake a greenish-blue bear.

“Sungmin?” Kyuhyun asked confusedly.

The fire rat turned around to face the Pikachu in his doorway and his eyes went wide.

“K-kyuhyun?” Sungmin choked out and then looked at Zhou Mi. “Mi?”

“Sungmin, don’t freak out but-“ Kyuhyun began but was interrupted by Sungmin’s scream.

“You’re a Pikachu, Mi’s a Sandshrew, Shindong’s a Munchlax, and I’m a freakin’ Cyndaquil.” Sungmin said before the quills on his back flared up. “You’re not really convincing me as to why I’m not supposed to freak out, Kyu!”

“Shindong’s a Munchlax? No freakin’ way!” Zhou Mi began laughing again.

“Mimi, shut up!!! Minnie, just listen to me.” Kyuhyun placed his hands up in defense. “But first, wake Shindong. He needs to hear this too.”

“Been workin’ on that for a few minutes now. He’s out cold.” Sungmin said pointing at the sleeping Munchlax.

“Have you tried using your powers?” Kyuhyun asked.

“No, I was in too much shock.” Sungmin said still not comfortable with his current form.

“Let me try.” Kyuhyun walked over to the Munchlax and gave him a light thundershock.

The Munchlax yelped in pain and jumped to its feet.

“What… the hell, Minnie?” Shindong asked rubbing his stomach.

“It wasn’t me. It was PikaKyu.” Sungmin pointed to the Pikachu.

Kyuhyun’s cheeks bristled with sparks as Sungmin backed away slightly.

“Hyung, if you ever call me that again, I’ll shock you into next year.” Kyuhyun threatened then turned his attention to Shindong who looked at the Pikachu with a confused look. “Yes, Shindong, I’m a Pikachu, Zhou Mi’s Sandshrew, and Sungmin’s a Cyndaquil. You are a Munchlax.”

“This is very confusing… I’m gonna go back to sleep now where everything makes sense…” Shindong said before beginning to lie back down.

He didn’t get very far before Kyuhyun send another thundershock his way. He sat back up immediately.

“Not so fast, hyung. We need to go check on the others.” Kyuhyun said.

“Chances are they’re all Pokémon too.” Zhou Mi added agreeing with his lover.

“We should get going.” Sungmin said pulling the Munchlax to his feet.

“Minnie, I don’t wanna…” Shindong whined standing up against his will.

They all headed out into the hall when they heard Ryeowook’s shrill scream ring through the apartment. They immediately ran to Yesung and his room and saw why he was screaming.

“Hyung?! Hyung!” A small ball of pink sat next to a small green turtle with a leaf on its head. “Yesung!”

“Yes, I’m right here, Wookie…” Yesung tiredly nuzzled up to the ball of pink.

“Wookie hyung, Yesung hyung?” Kyuhyun called out to the pair.

“Kyuhyun! The big pink ball of fluff called to him.

Both Sungmin and Zhou Mi burst out laughing at the sight of the big pink ball. Ryeowook was getting a little bit mad and opened his mouth to start singing.

“No! Wookie hyung! Don’t sing!!!!” Kyuhyun exclaimed before the Jigglypuff could get a single note out. “Please, calm down and let’s all talk about this.”

The Turtwig on the bed slowly made its way to the floor and sat next to the Pikachu. The Jigglypuff followed suit glaring daggers at Sungmin and Zhou Mi. Shindong the Munchlax had curled up by the doorframe and slept. Kyuhyun rolled his eyes before using thundershock on his sleeping hyung. Shindong woke up immediately and glared at Kyuhyun.

“Now that I have your attention, we are all Pokémon now.” Kyuhyun said.

“Well, that’s kinda obvious Kyu. I just really want to know how I became one.” Yesung said nonchalantly.

“Now that I think about it, I am actually kinda liking this Pokémon thing.” Ryeowook said as Sungmin and Zhou Mi rolled him around. “Whee!”

Kyuhyun shook his head before using a more powerful thundershock on all of them. All except Zhou Mi were affected.

“Stop playing around, hyungs!” Kyuhyun ordered. “We still have to check on the others!!!”

“You didn’t have to shock us. Geez…” Sungmin grumbled.

“You can’t hurt me!!!” Zhou Mi teased. “I’m invincible!”

“Keep that up, Mi…” Kyuhyun replied testily. “And you’ll be invincible alone.”

Zhou Mi shut up completely and began to walk out of the room to Eunhyuk’s and Donghae’s room. The rest of the Pokémon followed suit and chatted along the way

“So, hyung?” Sungmin asked. “What’s it like being a Turtwig?”

“I think this is how Ddangkoma feels…” Yesung answered honestly. “It feels slow…”

“Hey, hyung!” Ryeowook had just gotten a great idea. “Maybe you can talk to him now seeing as how you’re both turtles!”

“He has a point.” Kyuhyun nodded as they padded their way in front of the EunHae door. “Alright, you guys ready?”

They all pushed the slightly ajar door open to find the EunHae couple sitting on the bed. A purple monkey sat with a large glass bowl filled with water and a big red fish swimming around in it.

“Hyung?” Kyuhyun asked as the rest of the Pokémon filed in.

“Oh, hi Kyuhyun-ah!” Donghae called from the fishbowl.

Eunhyuk waved smiling at the rest of friends gathered in his doorway.

“You’re all Pokémon too, huh?” Eunhyuk said looking at his little fishy swimming in his bowl.

“Huh? Why aren’t you freaking out?” Shindong asked.

“Yeah, don’t you know that you’re Pokémon now?” Zhou Mi asked curling up into a ball and rolling around.

“I already did that. And besides, I’m a monkey. I’m not complaining. Donghae’s a fish, he’s not complaining either.” The Aipom said picking up the bowl with the Magikarp in it and jumping down from the bed.

“Oookay… That was easier than I thought it would be…” Kyuhyun said happily. “Let’s go and check on everyone else.”

Kyuhyun was the first to exit the room and everyone else flooded out into the hallway. They made their way to their leader’s room. Kyuhyun tried to reach the door but couldn’t.

“Dammit…” Kyuhyun said frustrated. “I can’t reach the knob…”

“I can get it.” Eunhyuk put down the fishbowl and stretched a long limb to the door and pushed it open.

The rest of the Pokémon came into the room where they saw a discarded Twister board, and messy bedspreads. However, the most surprising sight they saw was the flaming horse, large cat, an unidentifiable shape beneath the covers, a small green lizard thing next to it. There was a small blue alligator on the floor too. They were all still sleeping and Kyuhyun needed to wake them up.

“I can’t wake them up this time, because of that Totodile.” PikaKyu turned to the rest of his friends. “Wookie, can you do it?”

“Okay!” Ryeowook bounced up onto the desk; he took a deep breath and began to sing in a loud voice.

“His Uproar attack is really loud!” Sungmin exclaimed as he and the others covered their ears to avoid the sound.

When Ryeowook finished, the sleeping Pokémon on the bed all mumbled and groaned as they woke up. The first to wake up was Siwon who saw the big pink Pokémon sitting on the desk.

“Um… Why is there a Jigglypuff on that desk? I must be really tired…” He closed his eyes and then opened them once more to see if the image was gone.

Instead it remained and cocked its head to the side. Siwon’s eyes widened. He scrambled up against the wall. This action caused the large cat beside him to stir and glare at him.

“Siwon, shut up and go back to sleep…” Heechul scolded.

“No, hyung… You don’t understand.” Siwon pointed a hoof at the pink ball. “There’s a Jigglypuff on that desk…”

Heechul sat up fully now and glared at Siwon even harder.

“Siwon, how many times have I told you, when they pass it around, put it down?” Heechul stared at him before blinking and seeing a large off-white pony with a flaming mane next to him.

“I’m not kidding, hyung!” Siwon flailed frantically. “There’s really a Jigglypuff in the room!!! Look at it!!!”

It wasn’t until the Jigglypuff spoke that they realized what was going on.

“Hey, hyungs!” Ryeowook waved with his microphone marker smiling.

Siwon and Heechul looked at each other before screaming. Heechul rose up on all fours and Siwon scrambled to the floor trying to stand in that tiny cramped room. He wasn’t successful. He fell to the floor as Heechul the Persian pointed at him.

“Why are you a Ponyta?!!!” He yelled still standing on the bed.

“I don’t know!!! Why are you a Persian?!!!” Siwon yelled back even louder.

“Why are you both yelling?!” Said a really groggy voice. “Shut up and go back to sleep.”

The voice belonged to a small green lizard-like Pokémon that sat up and rubbed its eyes sleepily. Kyuhyun looked at the green Pokémon before calling out to it.

“Hyung? Wake up.” Kyuhyun said leaping up onto the bed and staring at the green Pokémon.

The green Pokémon was rugged looking, it had really rough skin and it had black lines under its eyes.

“Kyuhyun? What are you doing here?” He was still rubbing his eyes and when he stopped, his eyes fixed themselves on the small yellow rodent on his bed. “There’s a Pikachu on my bed… I bet Sungmin put all these stuffed animals in my room as a joke for betting on him.”

He reached for the Pikachu and picked it up.

“This one’s pretty heavy.” He noted.

“That’s because I’m a real Pikachu! Put me down, hyung!” Kyuhyun waved and kicked.

“Ah!” He dropped it in shock and looked at the Pikachu with a confused look. “W-why are you a Pikachu? Why are all you guys Pokémon?! What the hell’s goin’ on?!”

“That’s what we’re trying to find out! Please calm down!” Kyuhyun spoke offering up his hands in a gesture of peace. “Now, please wake up Teukie hyung and Henry.”

The Ponyta went over to the Totodile that slept soundly on the floor and Kangin rolled over to poke at Leeteuk’s back.

“Kangin… Shtop poking me…” He said sleepily.

Henry sat up and rubbed his eyes before taking in the scene before him. It looked like the inside of a “Look And Find Pokémon” book. He froze before reacting in the best way he knew possible.

“What the hell?” He swore in English. “Why are there so many Pokémon in here?!”

“We don’t know, just try to be calm.” Siwon said reassuringly but really, he didn’t know who he was trying to convince more.

“I’m just gonna go to Canada where everything makes sense and there are no Pokémon talking to me.” Henry stood up to go get his cell phone and phone home. That was when he noticed that he was waaay shorter than usual and could not reach his phone which was on the desk that Jigglypuff sat on.

“Okay, why can’t I reach the desk?” He angrily asked before he looked down and saw his little blue feet and little blue legs. “And why in God’s name am I blue?”

“No using the Lord’s name in vain! And you’re a Totodile!” Siwon scolded.

“Yup, I’m moving back to Canada.” He said jumping and trying to reach the desk.

“Henry, you ARE a Pokémon.” Ryeowook tried.

“Nope, I’m going back to Canada where I’m a human.” He kept trying to reach it before Sungmin the Cyndaquil used Ember effectively scaring him into staying still.

“You. ARE. A. Pokémon.” He said slowly.

Henry the Totodile sat back on his haunches and stared at the picture in front of him.

“Okay, so why, why am I a Pokémon? Why are you all Pokémon?” He asked calming down.

“Why is who a Pokémon?” A really groggy voice called from the bed.


The end of chapter two!!! I hope this is to you guys’ liking! I’m having fun writing it and I wanna know if you guys are having fun reading it!!!!

PokéSuJu? (1/?)

Title: PokéSuJu? (1/?)
Pairing: KyuMi, EunHae, and whatever else I feel like throwing in there
Rating: T for coarse language and adult-situations
Genre: Crack, romance, and fail!Humor
Summary: Who knew playing Pokémon could turn you into one? Not SuJu.
Author’s Crap: Forgive me for this pile of feces I’ve written…

“Aish, my Pikachu!!!!” Kyuhyun shouted at his game system.

“Did you really think you were gonna win, Kui Xian?” Zhou Mi smirked triumphantly.

It was quiet evening in the Super Junior dorm when Heechul suggested they all have a Pokémon competition on their DS systems. The winning prize was exemption from all household chores for a month. It was Zhou Mi VS Kyuhyun, Heechul VS Sungmin, Ryeowook VS Henry, and Eunhyuk VS Donghae.

“You cheated Mi!!! I demand a rematch!!!” Kyuhyun stood pointing at his boyfriend.

“I played fair and square. It’s not my fault you decided to put an Electric type up against a ground type…” He teased.

“Kyu, you lost. Sit down.” Umma Teukie said.

“But, hyung!” Kyuhyun protested.

“Sit.” Teukie said firmly.

Kyuhyun sat down reluctantly as Zhou Mi gloated. He glared at his boyfriend who was talking to Sungmin about how easy it was to beat him.

The victors had been decided all but one match coupling. The EunHae battle. They both sat there with intense concentration written on their faces. Eunhyuk had chosen a Ditto while Donghae had chosen a Magikarp.

The two were locked in a battle of repeated Splash attacks that did nothing for either one of them. The other members all looked at the duo and shouted for them to hurry up. Finally after about 10 minutes of nothing, a winner was declared. It was Eunhyuk who’s Ditto had run out of Power Points for his Splash attack and had to use Struggle.

The semi-finalists were, Zhou Mi, Sungmin, Henry, and Eunhyuk. It was decided that Eunhyuk would face off against Zhou Mi and Sungmin against Henry.

“You’re goin’ down, Mochi.” Sungmin said with a look of confidence.

“Hmph… We’ll see about that, hyung.” Henry smirked.

Sungmin sent out his Typhlosion and Henry sent out his Feraligatr.

“You should know by now that water beats fire, hyung.” Henry pointed out happy that this was going to be an easy match.

“And you should know by now that it’s a fatal mistake to underestimate your opponent, Mochi.” Sungmin smirked deviously.

Sungmin made his Typhlosion use Sunny Day and Henry’s Feraligatr used Surf. Both Pokémon were both on level 100 so the attack did to a number on Sungmin’s Typhlosion. He was smart however and had equipped his Pokémon with a berry. It restored his HP a quarter to full. He ordered his Typhlosion to use Solar Beam.

“What the-?!” Henry cried out as he saw his Feraligatr’s HP dropping rapidly. “That’s a fire type!
How does it know a grass type move like Solar Beam?!”

“I told you, never underestimate your opponent.” Sungmin smiled.

His Feraligatr had a less than a quarter of its HP left and Henry was losing badly. He ordered another Surf but it had missed.

“Dammit!!!” He swore in English as Sungmin’s Typhlosion hit him with another Solar Beam.

“I win, Mochi.” Sungmin smirked.

Henry returned the smirk before shaking his hyung’s hand.

“You’re pretty good, hyung.” He complimented.

“I’ve never lost a match with that Feraligatr.”

“You are too, gave me a run for my money with those Surf attacks.” Sungmin chuckled.

“Yesung, Siwon, you owe me money!” Kangin exclaimed.

They had bet on who was going to win between Sungmin and Henry. Yesung and Siwon grumbled and pulled their wallets from their pockets handing Kangin the money.

Kangin cackled with laughter and failed to notice Umma Teukie grab the money from his hand.

“Right, so I’ll just be taking back the 100000₩* you owe
me.” He said pocketing the money.

Kangin just stared at his empty hand while Yesung and Siwon laughed.

“…What just happened?” He asked still staring at his hand.

The rest of the dorm howled with laughter as they entered the final match.

The final match was to be between Zhou Mi and Sungmin. Zhou Mi had defeated Eunhyuk’s Ditto with ease and was happy to be facing his rival in Pokémon.

“Just like old times, Min?” Zhou Mi smiled disarmingly.

“Yeah, except that I’m going to beat you and break our tie.” Sungmin challenged returning Mi’s smile.

These two had been known around the dorm to compete constantly with each other and had reached a tie. This was bound to be an interesting match.

Sungmin sent out his Typhlosion and Zhou Mi sent out his Toterra. Both were matched a level 100 and were equally strong.

Sungmin ordered his Typhlosion to use Eruption. This was its ultimate attack and Sungmin knew it would knock some of Zhou Mi’s HP down.

Zhou Mi had a trick up his sleeve though. When the attack hit, his pokémon’s berry activated its special ability. It caused what would’ve been a super-effective attack to deal normal damage sparing his Pokémon from the majority of the damage.

“I should’ve known you’d do that.” Sungmin said as Zhou Mi’s Toterra used Earthquake.

Sungmin was smart though and did the exact same thing that Zhou Mi did with his berry. The damage was halved and Typhlosion was spared some serious damage.

“Not bad, Min.”

Sungmin ordered his Typhlosion to use Dig and it went underground. Zhou Mi smirked before laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Sungmin asked confusedly.

Then he looked at what he’d just done.

“Aiiiish!!!! No!!!” He yelled.

It was too late, Zhou Mi had ordered his Toterra to use Earthquake. Sungmin wailed as his Typhlosion’s HP diminished before his eyes. It was a deadly combination. Dig plus Earthquake was not good... Instant KO.

Everyone in the room was cheering and Zhou Mi stood up from his seat and congratulated his rival.

“That was some match.” Zhou Mi said shaking Sungmin’s hand.

“I’ll beat you next time.” Sungmin said with slight disappointment from losing.

“Zhou Mi is the winner and is exempt from all chores for a month.” Leeteuk said.

The rest of the room groaned at the reminder of the prize. They began to clear out one by one and went to their respective rooms.

“Kui Xian, you’re not still mad at me, are you?” Zhou Mi chuckled. “Have you forgotten about our own bet?”

Kyuhyun blushed before glaring at his boyfriend. He and Zhou Mi had bet that if Zhou Mi could beat him in pokémon, he’d let him top.

“Tsk, Tsk, Tsk…” Zhou Mi shook his head before grabbing Kyuhyun’s hand and pulling him into the room. “I’ll just have to fix that, won’t I?”

Zhou Mi pushed Kyuhyun against his door and kissed him with such a force that Kyuhyun’s mouth opened automatically. He sighed into the kiss and kissed him back swirling his tongue around Zhou Mi’s own. He felt his boyfriend slide a knee into his crotch and moaned at the friction. Zhou Mi broke the kiss and whispered against Kyuhyun’s ear.

“What do you say we,” His breath was hot against the shell of
Kyuhyun’s ear and his lover shuddered. “Take this to the bed? “

Kyuhyun didn’t have time to answer before he was roughly thrown on the bed and pounced on by his excited boyfriend.

As Zhou Mi began to nibble at his ear, Kyuhyun thought, man, I hate Pokémon…


In Eunhyuk’s room, he and Donghae were curled up watching a movie. Pokémon 2000. It was secretly one of Donghae’s favorite movies. Donghae curled up closer to Eunhyuk trying to keep himself warm. Eunhyuk laughed softly before pulling the comforter around both of them.

“Hyukkie, I want a Magikarp.” Donghae said with a serious face.

“I have one already.” Eunhyuk said smiling.

“Oooh, you do? Where is it???” Donghae’s eyes got bright.

“He’s right here.” Eunhyuk pointed at him.
Donghae frowned before smiling.

“I was talking about a real one but, I’m happy to be your Magikarp, Hyukkie.” Donghae pressed his lips to Eunhyuk’s cheek.

Eunhyuk grasped Donghae’s chin before pressing a kiss to his lips.

The movie played in the background forgotten as the pair ignored it in favor of each other.


“That’s the thing, Minnie hyung…” A drunken voice slurred. “I dunno what… *hic* to do…”

Sungmin was in his room with Ryeowook with 4 bottles of Soju and a bottle of Roggio on the floor. He was drunk but, nowhere near as drunk as his dongsaeng. Ryeowook was venting about his frustrations with Yesung.

“I mean, I keep throwing myself at him… *hic* and he won’t take the bait…” Ryeowook lifted the bottle to his mouth and drank from it once more. “*hic* Am I not attractive? Am I ugly, Minnie hyung?”

“No, Wookie, you are not ugly.” Sungmin said before picking up his glass of wine and downing all of it in one gulp. “Maybe he’s just scared.”

“Scared of what? *hic*” Ryeowook tried to focus his eyes on his hyung but was failing miserably. “Am I scary, Minnie hyung? *hic*”

Sungmin sighed. It sure was difficult to talk to Ryeowook when he was drunk. He was so off in insecurity land, Sungmin wasn’t sure he could bring him back to Earth.

“No, Wookie, you’re not scary. I meant, he could just be scared to take the next step.” Sungmin offered. “Maybe you should try a more direct approach.”

“More direct approach? *hic*” Ryeowook paused his sip from the bottle to look at his hyung. “How?”

“Why don’t you take matter into your own "hands"?” Sungmin emphasized the hands gesture. “Get it?”

Ryeowook blushed an even deeper red than had already been on his cheeks. Sungmin smirked.

“*hic* I’m gonna do it.” He stood drunkenly before exiting the room in a drunken manner.

“I didn’t mean today…” Sungmin called after him but, Ryeowook was already down the hall and couldn’t hear him.”

Sungmin sighed and picked up an unopened bottle of Soju and opened his phone.

“What are you doing right now, hyung?” He texted to Shindong.


In Leeteuk’s room, Heechul, Siwon, and Kangin were a tangled mess of limbs. They had decided to play Twister in that cramped space. Henry was sitting on Teukie’s bed with the spinner in his hand.

“So,” Leeteuk began to ask from his backbend position. “Whose "bright idea" was this?”

“It seemed like a good idea at the time.” Heechul said with his face and body inches above his own. “I’m not giving up!”

“Henry can you please spin the damn arrow already?!” Kangin growled from his position near Leeteuk’s crotch.

“I dunno, I think I like it like this…” He teased in a sing-song voice.

“Henry, this isn’t funny! Spin the arrow!” Siwon said struggling to keep his composure with his face so close to Heechul’s own.

“Okay,” He spun the arrow. “Right foot, green!”

In just that one movement, the tangled mess of limbs couldn’t keep their balance any longer and fell. Heechul fell directly on top of Siwon who groaned. Leeteuk landed on Kangin’s chest whose face lost all colour at seeing his hyung directly above him. Henry cackled with hyena-like laughter as he rolled around on the bed.

“This is so your fault, hyung.” Siwon said as he pulled Heechul’s face to his own and kissed him.

“There’s a fiesta in my pants, and you’re invited…” Kangin growled grabbing hold of Leeteuk’s hair and pulled him down for a hard kiss.

Henry continued to cackle even as moans and groans filled the room.


Kyuhyun sat up in his bed well rested and achy. He yawned and opened his eyes slowly. Everything looked bigger for some odd reason. He shrugged it off and reached for his cell phone. He opened it and saw a message from Jonghyun asking him did he want to go to a party later that day. He smiled and responded with a “Hell yes!”. His hands looked smaller, yellow, and more paw-like.

The message was sending and the screen was black. Kyuhyun looked at himself in the reflection of his screen. He was yellow and had big pointy yellow ears with black tips He had big blackish brown eyes and bright red cheeks. At first, he was confused but he shrugged it off and attributed it to being tired.

He lay back down to drift off into sleep. He didn’t get very far before he sat up and screamed.


The end of Chapter One!!!!
Tell me what you thought and if I should continue!

I Don't Understand...

Title: I Don't Understand...
Pairing: MiMin friendship and established QMi
Rating: T
Disclaimer: I kinda don't own them. I think that much is obvious. I'm pretty broke too...
Genre: Romance and angst
Summary: Zhou Mi is reading some of the comments left on his Weibo page by some of the less than reputable fans and reflects on all that's happened so far.
Author’s Note: When I heard what happened to Mimi I just had to write this… No one deserves that.

“How dare you insult Han Geng! He’s more than you’ll ever be!”

There’s another below it.

“You’re not even a member. You can’t say anything.”

There was comment after comment telling him how he wasn’t worthy to be called a human being, would never measure up to Geng-ge’s level of excellence, how he wasn’t a member of Super Junior.

He smiled sadly as he reclined backwards onto his mattress. He sighed and stared up at his ceiling dazedly thinking about what he’d done to deserve this.

Ever since they released “Super Girl”, he and Henry had both been receiving hate mail from die-hard fans of the original 13 members. At first they were angry but after a couple months went by, they grew used to the insults and were able to at least put on a smile for their fans when they preformed.

Or at least, that’s what Zhou Mi tells himself. His fake smile… The one that gets him through the chants of “only 13” and the silence when his name is called at the end of performances. The fake smile when he sees fans in the audience holding up their “only 13”. The fake smile when interviewers ask him if the anti fans bother him.

Even his boyfriend could see through that fake smile when Zhou Mi politely answered the interviewer. He’d ask what was wrong but Zhou Mi would respond that he was fine and that Kyuhyun shouldn’t worry about him. Kui Xian…. The one person he knew loved him no matter what and he loved in return. But, he still ached for the love of the fans.

I’m so selfish… I should be happy that I have someone to love me… He thought shaking his head free of thoughts.

“Maybe I don’t even deserve that… “ Zhou Mi tells no one in particular.

“Deserve what?” A light voice enters the room.

Zhou Mi sits up in his bed to see Sungmin standing in his doorway with a bright pink birthday hat and a slice of chocolate cake with pink icing on a plate. Sungmin smiled at him and Zhou Mi waved him in. The elder shut the door and sat down next to Zhou Mi on his bed.

“I wanted to check on you.” Sungmin said in a soft tone. “I heard you weren’t feeling too well.”

“It’s just a headache really…” Zhou Mi said smiling weakly. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stay and help you celebrate your birthday, hyung…”

Sungmin shook his head.

“No, it’s okay. You weren’t feeling well.” He said. He handed the plate he brought with him to Zhou Mi. “I brought this for you. You can eat it later.”

“Thanks, hyung.” Zhou Mi smiled placing the cake on the night stand. “It looks delicious!”

“Wookie made it!” Sungmin beamed. “Homemade chocolate cake is always the best! Everyone’s really worried about you. Especially Kyuhyun-ah. He said he’d come by a bit later.”

Zhou Mi felt a pang of guilt then. Sungmin noticed and placed a hand on Zhou Mi’s shoulder.

“Zhou Mi, what were you thinking about before I walked in?” Sungmin asked in a concerned tone.

He couldn’t tell him, could he? He was supposed to be the strong, confident Mimi that everyone knew. The one that everyone loved. Especially Kyuhyun.

He didn’t have enough time to formulate an appropriate answer before Sungmin glanced to his laptop screen. Shit! He’d forgotten he’d left it on. He watched as his hyung’s eyes grew wide. Sungmin looked back to Zhou Mi with a look of hurt.

“Zhou Mi, I’m sorry…” He apologized. “I didn’t know it was this bad…”

“You don’t have to apologize, hyung.” Zhou Mi shook his head. “I’m used to it… This is normal.”

Zhou Mi cast his eyes down to his comforter on the bed.

“Well it shouldn’t be! No one deserves this!” Sungmin took Zhou Mi by both his shoulders. “Look at me.”

Zhou Mi obeyed and saw the love in his hyung’s eyes.

“Listen, you are loved by everyone here. If anyone has a problem with that, that’s their problem. All that matters is that we love you.” Sungmin’s own eyes were slightly glistening with moisture.

“I don’t deserve it. I’m selfish…” Zhou Mi confessed.

“Where the hell did you hear that from?! Our fans?!” Sungmin demanded.

“No one told me. I just know that I’m selfish. I have his love and I want more. I want the love of our fans…” Zhou Mi said in a voice barely above a whisper.

Sungmin pulled Zhou Mi into what was probably the tightest embrace of his life. Zhou Mi just sank into the tight grip and sobbed silently into Sungmin’s chest.

“Why do they hate me?” The younger whispered into his friend.

“Because they can’t accept change…” Sungmin never loosened his grip.

Zhou Mi continued to shed the all the tears he’d pushed back. Sungmin rubbed his back in soothing circles and applied pressure to his lower back until he heard the sobbing die down and turn into soft breathing. Zhou Mi had fallen asleep. Sungmin lifted the younger off and settled him under his covers. He left silently but not before placing a friendly kiss on his dongsaeng’s forehead.

“Whether you believe it or not, you are loved, Mimi…” Sungmin whispered opening the door and leaving the room. “I’m sorry I didn’t see it sooner…”

Zhou Mi awoke about an hour later and stretched. His head was pounding even worse than it did before. He looked over to his nightstand to see the time. He sat up holding his head.

“Headache?” A deep voice spoke.

“Ugh… Yes…” Zhou Mi answered unconsciously.

He jolted after he realized that he wasn’t alone.

“Kui Xian?” Zhou Mi asked.

Kyuhyun just smiled and walked over to his boyfriend with a glass of water and two pills. Zhou Mi took them gratefully and downed the water.

“Minnie told me everything.” Kyuhyun got right to the point. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because, I wanted to be strong for you, for myself.” Zhou Mi looked down again. “I couldn’t let any of you see the weak side of me.”

“You’re so stupid…” Kyuhyun said.

“Huh?” Zhou Mi hadn’t expected that.
“You heard me.”

Kyuhyun slid closer to his boyfriend.

“Always trying to do things by yourself. Not letting anyone in. Afraid to show even the slightest weakness.” Kyuhyun spoke taking his hand and putting it under Zhou Mi’s chin. “Mimi, bottling up your feelings and acting like you’re not hurt doesn’t make you Superman.”

“You’re too good to me…” Zhou Mi chuckled solemnly. “You give me all your love and I’m still not satisfied…"

“It’s okay to be selfish, Mi.” Kyuhyun spoke taking Zhou Mi’s hand in his own. “You want their approval too and that’s fine.”

Kyuhyun’s fingers intertwined among Zhou Mi’s own tightly.

“You’re an idol. You want the love of your fans. That’s what every idol wants, Mi.” Kyuhyun said kissing Zhou Mi’s hand. “You forget I went through this too?”

Zhou Mi had in fact forgotten that Kyuhyun had gone through the same thing when he first joined.

“You are not alone. I am always here for you. You already know that, or did you forget that too?”

“I haven’t… And, I’m sorry… For not telling you…” Zhou Mi looked up into his lover’s chocolate brown eyes.

“I love you, Zhou Mi…. There isn’t a damn thing that anyone could say or do to change that either.” Kyuhyun smiled.

“I love you too, Kui Xian…” Zhou Mi leaned forward and placed a light kiss onto Kyuhyun’s lips.

Kyuhyun responded eagerly and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s torso pulling him closer into his body. Zhou Mi relaxed into his embrace and continued to kiss him for several minutes before Kyu pulled away.

“Kui Xian?” Zhou Mi asked.

“Relax…” Kyuhyun chuckled. “I’m not going anywhere. You need to eat something. I’m going to assume you haven’t eaten for a little while. Eat that cake.”

He reached for the night stand and grabbed the plate. He leaned against his boyfriend as he silently ate his cake. If Zhou Mi wasn’t sure about anything else, he was certain about this, he loved Kyuhyun and that everything was going to be okay.
And that Ryeowook made a damn good chocolate cake…

The end and stuffs....

It's The New Year And The Idiocy Begins...

It's the new year and already, trouble is sprouting... Yesterday, Zhou Mi of Super Junior(Screw what anyone says. Super Junior-M is still SUPER JUNIOR) had his Weibo(Or whatever the site's called) account hacked and the hacker posted some rude things about Han Geng. This caused the Geng fans and Only13er's to go stir-crazy with rage and post many rude and hateful comments on his page. Zhou Mi figured out that his account had been hacked and closed until the hacker situation dies down.

Now, what bothers me is the fact that there are people who believe that he was lying when he said his account had been hacked and posted those things himself. If you know Zhou Mi at all, you know that he's a very kind and honest person. Zhou Mi has put up with quite a lot since joining Super Junior and it's really quite amazing how well he's dealing with it.

I highly doubt that someone who is hated by many for just existing would do something as stupid as to insult Han Geng and make everyone upset. That's just plain masochistic. It's very obvious that the "Only 13" chants make him upset and unloved so why the hell would he add more fuel to the fire? That doesn't make any sense. If people stopped to actually think about these things before posting their idiotic comments, maybe we could all come to a general conclusion.

It's really interesting... The thought (or lack there of) process of some people. It's called deductive reasoning... Learn how to use it! Do some fuckin' research before posting your hateful ass comments you morons.

Seriously, it's a new fucking year. Can't we all just grow the fuck up and stop being douchebags? Leave Zhou Mi and Henry the fuck alone you asstards. There is no purpose in hating them for doing what they are paid to do and enjoy doing. Leave them alone and let them be happy!

It's been a couple years since their debut with SuJu-M and yet people are still arguing about it. What is there to argue about? They are members of Super Junior and will remain members of Super Junior until they no longer see fit. If you can't accept that, go re-evaluate yourself and your love for the group, but don't bash them just because you can't accept that your family grew a little larger! It's a new year and I suggest that everyone take a chill pill and sit the hell down.